We control things in order to enjoy our lives. If we have control over a situation in our life, then we believe that joy will sprout from that experience. We don't realize that joy comes from the unexpected, from the part of our lives that we don't have any control over.
For example, let’s observe the interactions that we share with others. How people act in response to us is completely out of our control, yet it's that very thing that we enjoy. Most people fear the future, which means that they don't feel safe about what's to come.
If they control their present moment because of this, then they are denying themselves the joy that comes from the unknown, which is where all joy comes from. Doing what needs to be done for a specific outcome is very different from controlling something for that same outcome.
Controlling your experience to the point of knowing all of the variables involved means that you don't feel safe, you are afraid on some level. If the outcome you are looking for materializes, then you are relieved, happy and overly excited because it is the polar opposite of the fear that you were concerned might manifest.
It is an unbalanced experience. Now, if the outcome doesn't unfold, then you could be paralyzed with fear and survival mode might kick into first gear. You are being controlled emotionally by your dependence on a specific outcome.
Whether you control something or not, when it's all said and done you will still have to take action. Life is about action. If we do our best to enjoy the present moment through curiosity of the unknown, then two things will happen; 1) we will have less of a need to control the outcome of the experience and 2) We open ourselves up to joy, because whatever happens is completely unexpected. We are free to experience it without any baggage that is brought up due to our expectations or fears.
These expectations, fears and safety measures, limits almost completely the level of joy that you can experience when you are fully embracing the present moment, as if you had no idea what could happen next.
The truth is, if you don’t think about what is to come, you can create magic in every moment. Every moment is literally... a new moment, which means it is separate from the previous one. You can choose to do something different at any given time and completely change the trajectory of what you were just doing.
You can be spontaneous and surprise even yourself. When you are spontaneous, you become unpredictable and when you are unpredictable, you begin to enjoy the things around you without the need to conform to what you think you should be doing.
This gives you the Freedom to enjoy the journey and not-only the short lived joy that comes from planned results. You can do both interchangeably.
In fact, it’s a great idea to work towards your goals from a place of “I wonder what will happen if I fully execute my strategy?”, as opposed to “if I fully execute my strategy then this needs to happen.”
Can you see how with one, you are dependent on the outcome and with the other you are free to enjoy the process? Also, which perspective do you think will give you a higher chance of actually achieving that goal or outcome?
Be curious and enjoy the process. It’s never quite what you think it will be!
To address deep rooted beliefs and live a healthy emotional life, it helps to remove any subconscious Emotional Footprint programs. These programs are at the core of our experience and dictate our mental health, our relationships with others and with ourselves and are also responsible for any emotional pain or suffering that we may be going through. To learn more about Emotional Footprints and how they control your life, you can download a free book about these subconscious programs here.